Minding the overflow . . .
"Sometimes when you're overwhelmed by a situation – when you're in the darkest of darkness – that's when your priorities are reordered." - Phoebe Snow
I've been craving quiet lately. It doesn't seem like there's been an unusual amount of noise or chaos in my life, but it feels like I'm supposed to be still.
I'm in that deep meditative state again where I have the urge to organize closets, clean out junk drawers, and dust in obscure places . . . I can feel it, a change is coming.
I've also had THE best conversations with my girlfriends about faith and faithfulness. It wasn't our intent, but all our talks related to these topics. Some are having their faith tested, and others have walked out on faith and are learning to be present in the moment.
It's one thing to believe, but it's a whole other level to continue to believe when you're going through.
Me? I'm continuing to learn about trust.
"Cece, you need to pour from your saucer, not your cup," a friend told me recently. I blinked a few times to let the words wash over me. I'd never heard it phrased that way before. "You're supposed to be giving from your overflow," she emphasized.
I should know this, right? I've heard this repeatedly; I've even said this in some form or fashion to others, but I think at some point in my overwhelm I lost the ability to determine when I have an overflow. If you're accustomed to giving at such a high level consistently, exhaustion or emotional overload may seem like just another day. And then we steel ourselves and armor up because it's what we've been taught to do; we press on. It's not until we've hit a wall that we realize we have nothing to give. And then what?
Here's where the Holy Spirit intervenes. It tells us to get still.
Getting still doesn't necessarily mean no movement; it simply means (to me) that despite all that is happening and however many directions I may get pulled, I shouldn't look to the world for refuge. I have to keep my eyes on Him.
I have to not only believe and have trusting eyes, but I have to put that belief and trust into action. `
There were signs all along. The feeling of restlessness (pour), people revealing their true selves and intentions (pour), the realization that I'm working toward a goal where the goal post will always move (pour), still grieving the loss of my brother (pour), and just ongoing unnecessary stressors (pour).
There were also signs of reprieve, instances that have built me up. Learning how to get out of the vicious void cycle with my special needs kiddo (fills me up), having the love and respect of my college-aged sons who check in on their mama from time to time (fills me up), having friends who call me out of the blue not because they need something but just out of genuine love and concern about your girl (fills me up), having mentors at this age who continually push me to that next level and remind me of who I am (fills me up). In this November season, my girlfriends who share their books, swap holiday romcom movies reviews, eat good meals, and drink great coffee with me (fills me up).
You're supposed to give from your overflow the words still echoing in my mind. Well, I ain't got it, y'all. I'm tapped out.
And when you're tapped, you start to doubt everything. For me it was "I don't think I can do this" or "I don't have the skills to do that."
But here’s what I’ve been taught while I am getting still in this season of change: it is essential to take those thoughts and rephrase them so it goes from "I don't think I can do this" to "Lord, show me how to do this." It takes, "I don't have the skills" to "Lord, what skills do I need?"
See the difference? We are immediately repositioned to a place of power in our lives. This is where He wants us. This fills you up.
What areas of your life do you need to get still and just know? Where is there a need for a shift? Where do you need a wake up call? I promise, you’ll lose nothing, just get ready for the overflow
What I’m Listening To Right Now
I’ve got a few songs on repeat. Some oldies but goodies, others new because my daughter listens to a lot of pop. Like a lot.
Pray for me y’all.
But here’s one that’s been speaking to me lately. I hope it blesses you/inspires you today. There’s a comment under the video that says, “ When you smile people see but when you cry no one sees. Only The Lord is worthy of trust.”
What I’m Writing
I’m writing as fast as I can. I got an idea for a holiday short story but (real talk) I’m struggling trying to wrap it up so I can get it edited and out there for you to enjoy. I did, however get the covers back and wanted your opinion. Which one grabs you? Let me know.
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